CW: body image stuff, food/diet talk For the last CW: body image stuff, food/diet talk

For the last couple of years I’ve worked hard on (mostly) being at peace with my body. I work out for my mental health and because it feels good, I stay off the scale, I don’t see any food as “bad” anymore.

The thing I haven’t been able to adjust is giving my body nutritious foods without diving into diet culture. If I don’t track foods I won’t eat veggies like....ever. If I do track foods, I start worrying about calories, losing weight, etc. So I’ve chosen not to worry about it, for fear of falling back into an unhealthy relationship with food and my body.

Smoothies have always been a good way for me to get fruits and veggies but it’s a lot of work and tbh making a good smoothie requires a LOT of ingredients and then I end up with a massive smoothie. That’s why when I first heard about @kencko, it seemed too good to be true. Freeze dried fruits that you mix in water or any milk, like a protein shake. 2.5 servings of fruits/veggies per packet. (The packets are compostable btw). LOADS of flavor options with various benefits.

I was sold.

I signed up for three months to get the best deal, PRAYING they would taste good and y’all......they are incredible. I am shocked at how much I love them, even the flavors I didn’t think I would be crazy about. I signed up for 20/month and will def be increasing that quantity.

Sorry this is soooo long winded but I wanted to share in case anyone else had similar struggles. They do have a referral code so if you want $10 off your first box just let me know 💕
“Every day is a gift.” That’s what I said t “Every day is a gift.”

That’s what I said to myself when I woke up on Monday. I got dressed in an outfit I loved and promised to make it a good day. And the universe said “okay let’s see how far we can push this gratitude thing” and threw A LOT of shit at me 😂 I still ended my day with a smile and a @onepeloton @jesskingnyc ride. Then I couldn’t sleep because I worked out too late but it’s fine.

Woke up today with the same attitude. Drove an hour to get my second vaccine, arrived for my appointment and they told me they didn’t have the vaccine I needed. Even though I had called to check last week to ensure this didn’t happen. 2.5 hours in the middle of the work day wasted. After working until 10:15 last night and getting four hours of sleep.

I’m still not going to let it break me. (And yes, I was able to find another appointment and I’m SURE it’s the right vaccine.) Life is so precious and I’m so grateful for what I have. I’m especially grateful that in just a few weeks I finally get to see my family for the first time in over a year. What a joy. Sometimes I never thought that moment would come - I shed a lot of tears over it. But it’s almost here.

The only bad thing is now I have to find another vaccine outfit because I wasted this one today.
I guess I’m posting outfit photos again! They wo I guess I’m posting outfit photos again! They won’t be very aesthetic but I’m excited to share and also document what I wear. I know a lot of y’all are here from my fashion blogging days so thanks for sticking around 💕

A wardrobe shift usually means having to buy a bunch of new stuff. For me, what I really “needed” more of was plain tees. I tried to look at sustainable brands but honestly they were just too pricey especially considering the sub-par reviews. So instead I went with my old standby...Target. Their shirts have always lasted me a really long time and the one I’m wearing here is linen 😍 I was very picky and took back a few that didn’t quite fit me properly. All in all I spent around $40 and now have a wardrobe that feels really filled out - here’s to hoping they last me a few years like my current Target shirts have!

I guess all this to say...sometimes you just have to make the best choice for you. I intend on keeping this shirts in my closet for a long long time and know they will get tons of love. Now I’m back on my super low/no buy and can’t wait to wear in my new goodies! 

Ps VERY excited to be wearing sandals! It’s finally spring (?????)
This feels extremely 2014 IG but I’m fine with t This feels extremely 2014 IG but I’m fine with that. My style has changed so much and this is where I’ve been living lately - simple neutrals, plus a couple of necklaces. Color correcting cream, mascara, brows, Fenty gloss bomb because it’s literally the only lip product that doesn’t make my lips crack the next day. 

Anyone else’s style completely change in the past year? My closet looks so different and past me would think it’s “boring” but I feel good and getting dressed is easy now so who cares. 

Ps @roseybeeme influenced me to buy this letter necklace and it makes me feel like a mobster and I love that.
Little Plop got an upgrade to his playpen today (a Little Plop got an upgrade to his playpen today (a pillow) and he is OBSESSED. 

I’m going to keep saying this, if you’re in the denver area and looking for a puppy...he is perfect. It’s going to be hard for me to let this little guy go. Message me if you’re interested in adopting him and feel free to tag someone!

He’s ten weeks, some kind of mix but definitely has wire hair like a terrier. Will probably be small/medium like 25-30 pounds. Very smart and spunky but has a neurological disorder that causes him to have a bit of weakness in his back legs.
Meet Duke, our newest foster puppy. He is a precio Meet Duke, our newest foster puppy. He is a precious brindle wiry haired pup, who also has a neurological condition that makes his legs a little wobbly. Duke doesn’t let that slow him down though. He is curious, playful, loving, and I can’t wait to spend the next week with him. He will be up for adoption next Saturday via @coloradopuppyrescue 💕
Current obsession: this weird little centerpiece I Current obsession: this weird little centerpiece I made using dried flowers that I used in a @brennancandleco shoot. Trying to be better about reusing and giving things a second life like this cute little fox(?) skull.
We are not fans 😩 We are not fans 😩
“Less is more” was a phrase that never resonat “Less is more” was a phrase that never resonated with me. I used to always jokingly say “more is more” and honestly, one of the most surprising outcomes of the pandemic is I’m….becoming a minimalist. I’ve decluttered LOADS of stuff (I wish I had documented it, honestly) - at least 50% of my wardrobe, probably more. I’ve been on a serious low buy since the start of 2020 with only a few additions. We’ve even sold off about 1/3 of our furniture! 

And I have to be honest….I love the breathing room. I feel more at peace. I feel lighter in the spaces where I’ve decluttered more. 

I still have a lot of work to do. And I want to be intentional about my minimalism - it’s not about the aesthetic. It’s about only having things that I love or that serve a purpose. I want to continue to minimize my carbon footprint by buying less. Minimalism for me is not purchasing a new capsule wardrobe every season. It’s finding a style I love and sticking with it, with a few additions here and there. It’s a “1 in 1 out” rule for clothing. It’s getting rid of things responsibly when I want to change things up. It’s a space that’s easier to clean because I don’t have to spend HOURS tidying up and trying to find a space for all of my stuff.

So anyway, here’s my new dining room - we got rid of a coffee table and relocated two big chairs. I’m sitting in one of them while I take this photo. I feel at peace.

Any other minimalists out there? Has the pandemic made you think more about your space since you’re in it more?
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Fashion · May 25, 2018

I Quit My Job.

This post may contain affiliate links, which means if you click and/or make a purchase, I may earn a few cents at no additional cost to you. Any products gifted by a brand will be marked "c/o." Thanks for helping make this blog possible! <3

Y’all know I’ve been…..a hot mess lately lol. And although that’s kind of my normal MO, the last month or so I’ve really been at next level “hot mess” and now I can FINALLY reveal why!

I quit my full time job.

No I am not blogging and/or running Fiercely full time. But for the last year, I’ve been working full time, working part time for another company, AND I’ve been juggling my own stuff. Plus add in there keeping my marriage afloat, trying to maintain relationships with all my Dallas friends, visiting friends and family, trying to make Denver feel more like home, meeting new people here…..you get it.

Something had to give. So I quit my full time job and I will be working part time (remotely, three days a week) for a marketing firm based in Irving, Texas. I actually used to work there full time and have been helping out with their social media the last year! Then 2 days a week, I’ll be working on my blog and shop – get ready for things to ramp back up! And then….I’ll have two days a week where I DO NOT WORK. This is such a foreign concept to me.

Before I go any further, let me say I am SO thankful that my (former) full time job allowed me the freedoms it did. I have worked remotely the last three years and I know most would consider that a luxury. Yes it comes with it’s own set of challenges, but it is AMAZING and I’m sooooo thankful I was introduced to remote work life. I worked for a solid company with some amazing humans, but I haven’t felt fulfilled in quite a while.

You see, my job was fine, but it was too easy. I was a customer service rep but it required almost no critical thinking, no creativity, I just read from a script and occasionally answered some questions that weren’t on the script. Which was great at first – I got to do semi mindless work for my 9-5, and focused all my creativity on my outside projects. But eventually, it started to take it’s toll on me and things took a turn. My anxiety increased, my productivity in ALL aspects of life decreased and I was constantly frustrated with myself. I wasn’t “me” anymore and it was reflecting in my work, which made it worse because I find a LOT of my identity in my work.

I’m an ENFP, and after revisiting 16personalities.com, it all started to make sense:

“Repetition, predictability, boredom… while some Sentinel types may appreciate predictability and clear hierarchies, these are not selling points for ENFPs. People with the ENFP personality type need to feel like they’re pushing boundaries and exploring ideas, and should focus on interests and careers that encourage that.”

….oh. I literally wasn’t made for this life. It has nothing to do with the job, there’s just nothing I can do. I’ve been in the same position for three years and it’s not fitting anymore. My heart was telling me I needed something new, but so was my BRAIN.

And guess what y’all, that’s totally okay! I would NEVER tell you to just straight up quit your job, but if you’re feeling like something isn’t fitting, start to think about an exit plan. What would it take for your life to improve? What do you like about your current job? What do you dislike? These are questions you can start to ask yourself if you’re feeling the panic of “omg what do I do now?!”

For me, I LOVED my coworkers, I loved getting to help people on a daily basis, and I loved working remotely. So I needed a solution that kept those pros, but also allowed me to be more creative and left more time for my own work. I have also learned that I prefer positions where I get to form more long-term relationships with clients – that’s important to me.

So what do these things look like with my new situation? Now I’ll be working three days a week (remotely) for a marketing firm, doing social media, SEO and whatever else they need. It’s a small firm, so everyone wears lots of hats (another thing that I love!)

  • Coworkers: I LOVE the people who work at the firm, we get along SO well! As I mentioned above, I used to work for them back when I lived in Dallas and it was a blast.
  • Helping people: I know some people don’t think of marketing as a “helping” job, but I really do! I love helping others grow their businesses and I get a lot out of it!
  • Creativity: Marketing is SUCH a creative field and the firm I’m working for is smaller so there’s more need for flexibility, learning new skills and trying out new ideas. All things that Iove! Also most of our clients are arts-based so sometimes I get to market shows for some of my favorite artists, which is REALLY cool.
  • Remote: I’ll still be working remotely, but since the firm is based in Dallas (and my friends and family are all in DFW), I can still visit and spend a few days working in the office to make sure I’m up to date on all projects and just to get some face time in with real humans lol. Working remotely can be LOVELY but it can also be LONELY.
  • Time: This is going to free up SO much time for me so that I can work on my businesses during normal business hours. I’m looking forward to having a more normal work/life balance, something I haven’t had for ages. Also, I literally don’t have any hobbies except watching tv so I’m really excited to explore that more (this is very sad to admit but it is what it is and I know a lot of other entrepreneurs feel the same way).

A few weeks ago, I went to a brunch with a Meyers-Briggs specialist and one thing she focused on was not to use your type as a crutch. This is suuuuper important. Don’t make excuses for bad behavior or habits because of your type. However, I think it can be helpful in seeing WHY you’re reacting to certain things a certain way. It definitely was for me. I felt like I was failing and couldn’t do any better, no matter what I changed. Turns out, I was just in the wrong job for my brain.

I don’t really know what else to say other than the fact that I’m really excited to see what the future holds. I’m grateful for my past opportunities, and I’m thrilled to have some new things on the horizon. My word for 2018 is Flourish and I’m fighting like hell to make sure that’s what happens. For now, I’m spending the next week and a half in celebration mode. I’m heading to Memphis with two of my besties to see Justin Timberlake, and party with a bunch of diehard fans on the floor. After that, I’m going back to Texas where I’ll be spending a few days in the office to get “settled” into my new position.

Fight for the life you deserve. Because you really do deserve it.

xoxo
Valery

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Comments

  1. Stephanie says

    May 25, 2018 at 1:54 PM

    You are FLOURISHING! So proud of you. Cannot wait for your new adventures to unfold.

  2. Heather Webb says

    May 25, 2018 at 5:32 PM

    I’m so happy for you! I also can relate SO MUCH to being unhappy in your position and feeling like you are stuck. It’s how I felt in my last job, where I was also a customer service rep, and I had all the same things happen. My anxiety increased and I was so unfulfilled. I finally found my current job and I’m thriving there. It’s a smaller start up where I build relationships with my clients and it’s such a better fit. I’m so happy you’ve found something that works for you and I can’t wait to follow along on your journey.

  3. Meg Ackley says

    May 26, 2018 at 5:21 AM

    We’re cheering for you, Valery!! Very proud of you!

  4. Diane Owen says

    May 26, 2018 at 10:35 AM

    I am thrilled that you were able to make this work! You make me so proud! Keep being you, I love her. ❤️

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CW: body image stuff, food/diet talk For the last CW: body image stuff, food/diet talk

For the last couple of years I’ve worked hard on (mostly) being at peace with my body. I work out for my mental health and because it feels good, I stay off the scale, I don’t see any food as “bad” anymore.

The thing I haven’t been able to adjust is giving my body nutritious foods without diving into diet culture. If I don’t track foods I won’t eat veggies like....ever. If I do track foods, I start worrying about calories, losing weight, etc. So I’ve chosen not to worry about it, for fear of falling back into an unhealthy relationship with food and my body.

Smoothies have always been a good way for me to get fruits and veggies but it’s a lot of work and tbh making a good smoothie requires a LOT of ingredients and then I end up with a massive smoothie. That’s why when I first heard about @kencko, it seemed too good to be true. Freeze dried fruits that you mix in water or any milk, like a protein shake. 2.5 servings of fruits/veggies per packet. (The packets are compostable btw). LOADS of flavor options with various benefits.

I was sold.

I signed up for three months to get the best deal, PRAYING they would taste good and y’all......they are incredible. I am shocked at how much I love them, even the flavors I didn’t think I would be crazy about. I signed up for 20/month and will def be increasing that quantity.

Sorry this is soooo long winded but I wanted to share in case anyone else had similar struggles. They do have a referral code so if you want $10 off your first box just let me know 💕
“Every day is a gift.” That’s what I said t “Every day is a gift.”

That’s what I said to myself when I woke up on Monday. I got dressed in an outfit I loved and promised to make it a good day. And the universe said “okay let’s see how far we can push this gratitude thing” and threw A LOT of shit at me 😂 I still ended my day with a smile and a @onepeloton @jesskingnyc ride. Then I couldn’t sleep because I worked out too late but it’s fine.

Woke up today with the same attitude. Drove an hour to get my second vaccine, arrived for my appointment and they told me they didn’t have the vaccine I needed. Even though I had called to check last week to ensure this didn’t happen. 2.5 hours in the middle of the work day wasted. After working until 10:15 last night and getting four hours of sleep.

I’m still not going to let it break me. (And yes, I was able to find another appointment and I’m SURE it’s the right vaccine.) Life is so precious and I’m so grateful for what I have. I’m especially grateful that in just a few weeks I finally get to see my family for the first time in over a year. What a joy. Sometimes I never thought that moment would come - I shed a lot of tears over it. But it’s almost here.

The only bad thing is now I have to find another vaccine outfit because I wasted this one today.
I guess I’m posting outfit photos again! They wo I guess I’m posting outfit photos again! They won’t be very aesthetic but I’m excited to share and also document what I wear. I know a lot of y’all are here from my fashion blogging days so thanks for sticking around 💕

A wardrobe shift usually means having to buy a bunch of new stuff. For me, what I really “needed” more of was plain tees. I tried to look at sustainable brands but honestly they were just too pricey especially considering the sub-par reviews. So instead I went with my old standby...Target. Their shirts have always lasted me a really long time and the one I’m wearing here is linen 😍 I was very picky and took back a few that didn’t quite fit me properly. All in all I spent around $40 and now have a wardrobe that feels really filled out - here’s to hoping they last me a few years like my current Target shirts have!

I guess all this to say...sometimes you just have to make the best choice for you. I intend on keeping this shirts in my closet for a long long time and know they will get tons of love. Now I’m back on my super low/no buy and can’t wait to wear in my new goodies! 

Ps VERY excited to be wearing sandals! It’s finally spring (?????)
This feels extremely 2014 IG but I’m fine with t This feels extremely 2014 IG but I’m fine with that. My style has changed so much and this is where I’ve been living lately - simple neutrals, plus a couple of necklaces. Color correcting cream, mascara, brows, Fenty gloss bomb because it’s literally the only lip product that doesn’t make my lips crack the next day. 

Anyone else’s style completely change in the past year? My closet looks so different and past me would think it’s “boring” but I feel good and getting dressed is easy now so who cares. 

Ps @roseybeeme influenced me to buy this letter necklace and it makes me feel like a mobster and I love that.
Little Plop got an upgrade to his playpen today (a Little Plop got an upgrade to his playpen today (a pillow) and he is OBSESSED. 

I’m going to keep saying this, if you’re in the denver area and looking for a puppy...he is perfect. It’s going to be hard for me to let this little guy go. Message me if you’re interested in adopting him and feel free to tag someone!

He’s ten weeks, some kind of mix but definitely has wire hair like a terrier. Will probably be small/medium like 25-30 pounds. Very smart and spunky but has a neurological disorder that causes him to have a bit of weakness in his back legs.
Meet Duke, our newest foster puppy. He is a precio Meet Duke, our newest foster puppy. He is a precious brindle wiry haired pup, who also has a neurological condition that makes his legs a little wobbly. Duke doesn’t let that slow him down though. He is curious, playful, loving, and I can’t wait to spend the next week with him. He will be up for adoption next Saturday via @coloradopuppyrescue 💕
Current obsession: this weird little centerpiece I Current obsession: this weird little centerpiece I made using dried flowers that I used in a @brennancandleco shoot. Trying to be better about reusing and giving things a second life like this cute little fox(?) skull.
We are not fans 😩 We are not fans 😩
“Less is more” was a phrase that never resonat “Less is more” was a phrase that never resonated with me. I used to always jokingly say “more is more” and honestly, one of the most surprising outcomes of the pandemic is I’m….becoming a minimalist. I’ve decluttered LOADS of stuff (I wish I had documented it, honestly) - at least 50% of my wardrobe, probably more. I’ve been on a serious low buy since the start of 2020 with only a few additions. We’ve even sold off about 1/3 of our furniture! 

And I have to be honest….I love the breathing room. I feel more at peace. I feel lighter in the spaces where I’ve decluttered more. 

I still have a lot of work to do. And I want to be intentional about my minimalism - it’s not about the aesthetic. It’s about only having things that I love or that serve a purpose. I want to continue to minimize my carbon footprint by buying less. Minimalism for me is not purchasing a new capsule wardrobe every season. It’s finding a style I love and sticking with it, with a few additions here and there. It’s a “1 in 1 out” rule for clothing. It’s getting rid of things responsibly when I want to change things up. It’s a space that’s easier to clean because I don’t have to spend HOURS tidying up and trying to find a space for all of my stuff.

So anyway, here’s my new dining room - we got rid of a coffee table and relocated two big chairs. I’m sitting in one of them while I take this photo. I feel at peace.

Any other minimalists out there? Has the pandemic made you think more about your space since you’re in it more?
Fuck yeah. 💪🏻 Fuck yeah. 💪🏻

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